Media Alert!

September 2023

Blog #47

Sue Summers

MediaSavvyKids.org

“Don’t live the way this world lives. Let your way of thinking be completely changed. Then you will be able to test what God wants for you. And you will agree that what he wants is right. His plan is good and pleasing and perfect.” Romans 12:2 (NIRV)

“Where’s Grandma?”

Cultural norms are both generated and reinforced by the media in TV programs, movies, and advertising. Who sets the course? Sometimes it’s public policy that’s been enacted by the legislative process. For example, in the 50s, smoking was the rage in movies, with the leading man or woman often seen puffing away. Now that is seen as culturally unacceptable.

Sometimes the course is set by pressure from special interest groups with money and influence. The portrayal of the “normal family” has changed radically over the past decades. As single parent families became more common, the entertainment media adapted storylines to normalize this shift in the culture. What used to be viewed as unusual alternative “lifestyles” are now presented by colorful and likeable LGBT characters sprinkled throughout media offerings. The popular sitcom, “Modern Family” (which aired from 2009-2020, and now has endless reruns), is an example of what is depicted as the new structure of family, including two gay men raising a daughter together, all with a laugh track and comedic lines.

“Representation matters. Seeing other people on screens, hearing their stories, buying products from commercials, and watching shows that resemble a piece of you can, in turn, shape your identity and worldview.” (“Age and media representation”, July 29, 2022, http://www.research.colostate.ed)

What is interesting is that no matter how the average family has been represented in entertainment media and commercials, there tends to be the same missing elements – the extended family (grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and in-laws). And most noticeably, it’s the grandparents who are MIA! If they are mentioned, it’s usually in connection with bizarre Thanksgiving visits or inappropriate gifts sent to the children from far-off (and unimportant) grandparents.

“The AARP and Getty collaboration began after AARP analyzed more than 1,000 images selected by popular media and product brands to depict older Americans. Often, older adults were left out of the picture entirely. Though they make up nearly half the population in the United States, they were shown in just 15% of photos.” (“Ageism is costing this country billions. Here’s how”, Sept. 24, 2019, http://www.deseret.com

Then there are times when members of the older generation do become part of the story, as infirm, needy, out-of-touch, or troubling characters that bring unwelcome struggles into the lives of the main characters.

“… media portray older adults very differently, more often as patients in medical settings or sitting alone on park benches staring into space than engaged in jobs, using technology, or vigorously interacting with people and surroundings. The New York Times this week described America’s post-50 demographic as ‘shunned and caricatured’ instead of embraced as engaged and skillful people with financial resources. Negative portrayal based on age is ageism.” (“Ageism is costing this country billions. Here’s how”, Sept. 24, 2019, http://www.deseret.com)

“Our upbringing and socialization, outlook on life, and personal experiences all play a role in the way we view each other. Because we live in a commercial- and media-driven society, television shows, advertisements, movies, cartoons, and even music affect the way we perceive the world around us, including our views on aging.” (“Aging and the Media: Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow”, Californian Journal of Health Promotion, 2007)

What difference does it make if extended family members are not included or depicted favorably in media? Seeing the marginalization of them, particularly elders, makes it appear that marginal treatment is the norm. There are real life ramifications, not only in public policy but in acceptable societal behavior. It can affect the larger understanding of family dynamics, stealing the desire and opportunity to learn wisdom or history from aunts, uncles, and grandparents.

So how can we help teens become media-savvy about the culture that surrounds them?

Teens will embrace the values and beliefs of their parents, grandparents, teachers, coaches, and youth pastors. If these are not shared by the significant people in their lives, they will often absorb the values portrayed by the media. Here are some ways to reinforce the importance of extended family relationships with your teens.

• Watch TV and movies together. Then discuss the relationships depicted in entertainment and commercials. Ask if the story could have been changed or improved with the inclusion of extended family members.

• Read stories from the Old and New Testament together. Focus on the family dynamics and relationships in your discussions.

• Share your family history, explaining the roles and contributions, or missed opportunities of various grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins to impact the well-being of your family.

• Discuss the extended family in other cultures. Share:   

“In cultures such as American Indian, Asian, Hispanic, African, and Middle Eastern, individuals rely heavily on an extended network of reciprocal relationships with parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, and many others. Many of these people are involved in important health care decisions, including some who are unrelated to the patient through blood or marriage. For example, in some Hispanic families the godparents play a critical role. In American Indian families, tribal leaders, the elderly, and medicine men/women are key individuals to be consulted before important decisions are made.” (“Cultural Differences in Family Dynamics”, www.dimensionsofculture.com)

• Have adults share stories from their childhoods remembering time spent with aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents.

• Ask, “Is there a benefit to having extended family members in your life?”

• If your grandparents, aunts, uncles, or cousins live far away, connect with them by phone or Zoom calls, asking specific questions about them and your family’s history. If they live nearby, set up a time for a family get-together, asking each family member to share some of their memories.

Note: Share this blog with your church’s youth pastor as a lesson for youth group gatherings.

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Sue Summers is a Christian media analyst, teacher, author, and speaker.

She is the Director of Media Alert!

Contact Info:

Blogs: MediaSavvyKids.org

Website: http://www.MediaAlert.org

Email: Sue@MediaAlert.org

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